Saturday, 24 November 2012

Alone.


Man is away for the weekend.
He has returned to his motherland.
It leaves me in the house alone. Which I do actually quite like.
He has gone to fetch more of his possessions. To drown what little amount I have here, even more.
I'll forgive him. He found me some little cups and saucers. They were all mucky from the mud in which they sat, down amongst the boats.
He said it could girlify things.
I like them. 


Even though I like my alone time here. Making it feel more like home in a different way. I have not yet spent the night alone in the abode.
I know I will stay awake listening. Sounds in the walls and floors. Pipes creaking and stairs relaxing. Was that a footstep?
My imagination is silly while I try to sleep.
During the days I occupy myself with job hunting and the occasional nap. 
Taking photos of the weather behind the window and curling up in a ball, hiding from the furious wind.
The wind and rain scared me.
I have never seen anything like it.
The sea fell from the sky, and the wind whipped it to the side.
Thick and unquick. 
The garden fence split.

A good calm after the storm. Yesterday was a very pleasant day.
I woke up refreshed. The sky was some blue. Some white. Some grey.
The air was fresh and still.
I walked and walked.
Around the town and down and through. Stepping through the brittle air. Cold and sharp like it should me this time of year. It reminded me of times in Bath.
My first home. 
When walking I made up my mind that I would be ok again. I would feel content once more.
Remembering previous winters where I would sit in a coffee shop, or the back of a pub. Smoke around. Coffee/pint in hand. Wrapped up in warm layers. Sat under heaters. 
Whilst I miss these previous winters when I have had company, I found myself alone yesterday evening.
And I did not wish for anything else.
Soft thoughts of what I need to do.
Jobs. Buys. Socials. Saves.
It was a comfort. 


It is not so bad to be alone. 

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