A mess for Mr. Writer.

Wheat.

I'm doing some drawings for my rings, experimenting with layering. Maybe introducing some colour.. I know, mind blowing, but I'm feeling it. Apart from anything, I just had fun drawing and painting again. It's been a while since I have enjoyed just free hand drawing and splashing colour on a page.

Inspired.

Snowflake.

• Ice-cold
• One of a kind
• White
• Delicate
• Temporary

What they really look like, it's hard to see.

///

A Frost saved my life.

My Shed.

And this is the Shed. This is where i will be living for the next few weeks as I complete my work to pass my degree.

I have a really nice cosy set up.

• Laptop
• Music
• Sketchbooks
• Lights
• Cigarettes
• Coffee
• Rain
• Sun
• Motivation

This really is my shed. I've been listening to the Glastonbury playlists on Spotify made by the Guardian Music profile. It is slightly mad how much it has effected my mood. With the rain, the music, and the peeking sun, it almost feels like i'm there at the festival. Or at least i have the same feeling here as i do when i am there. Of course i would rather be at Glastonbury, but it is my fault that i am not, and this is how i am going to rectify my laziness.

I am finally motivated, and feeling good. I think the next few weeks will be a chance to just get on with it. Work for myself, no-one else.

All the while being protected by the rain. The smell and the sound just adding to my happiness. It is a very strange happiness. Content may be the word.

The End, again.

It is strange to think that last thursday, me and Chloë where sat on the edge of the quayside, eating chips, drinking wine and smoking cheap cigarettes. We reminisced, we gave voices to seagulls, we walked through Falmouth, starting our goodbyes to this place we had grown to love over the last three years.

Friday was my private view for the end of the year, and everyones work was really amazing. I wish everyone the best of luck, and i feel bad for not sticking around, but i really couldn't take it. My parents came down to pick up my things to move out, and they took us out for a good hearty steak dinner. There was a sea shanty festival happening on the quayside, where we were reminiscing the evening before. My Dad loved it, and heard it half a mile away. He was in his element.

The last night in the Wonky Blue house was very bizarre. Apparently we are the only two who have stayed for more than a year. Everything was empty. Almost how we found it.

I will miss this house. It has the most character of any house i have ever seen. Perhaps there is such a thing as too much. Nevertheless this house will be remembered.

All too soon, my room was bare. My things where on their way to Frome, and our keys where on the table.

As much as i am sad to leave this house, and this place that has been my home for two/three years, i am quite glad to go. This marks the end of a lot of things and the beginnings of new ones.

Coming home and unpacking for the last few days has been another strange experience. Seeing the things that i have become accustom to seeing in the Blue house, in my room makes it all too apparent that i am not quite moving onto anything new. I have moved back home, in a limbo, waiting for what is next.

I even got slightly emotional when i emptied my jar of coppers.

The past couple of weeks have been eventful. Minor and major mishaps. Happiness and sadness at leaving somewhere that has pushed me into another direction. The last few days have been down days, with frustration mounting. The nagging has only just begun. Get a job, do your work. There will be stress, a lot of it to come. All i can really do is try my best, and when i can, enjoy the comforts of being home.

Good Luck.

I have a laptop again! Say what you will about the price of Macs, but its the service that you really pay for. I got this one as a replacement and for free. Hopefully this is my bad luck over. This is sadly the last saved picture that i have on my backup. I lost all my pictures from June. Nothing can be done for that now, all i know is that i am going to back up everyday.

I can finally listen to my music again. I can talk to people, play the sims, blog and everything else. The one drawback is not having photoshop. It's a shame, but i will find another one.

Now all i need to do is find a job, finish my uni work, and carry on.

Wish me luck.

Words

Tree in Summer
Tree in Winter
April Showers
Bunch of Flowers

Grass seeds
Hay bails
Fields of Green
More beautiful things are still to be seen

The chaos of hair
The depth of dark eyes
Soft touch of lips
The curve of her hips

...

Jinxed

These last 7 days have been truly terrible.

Thursday 9th:
Pre-drinking in my room, my laptop providing music and internet entertainment, and Chloe spills dissoronno on it. Possibly the worst drink to ever spill on a laptop. I go out anyway, having left the laptop to dry out. I was a state that night. Vomit. Everywhere.

A great start.

Friday 10th:
Hungover. Laptop wouldn't turn on. I spent the whole day dragging Chloe around, trying to find a screw driver that would fit the screws on the back of it the laptop. Mac really don't want you to fix your own technology. When the back came off there were actual puddles of syrup in there. All over the battery, hardrive, circetboard. Just a big sticky mess.

Saturday 11th:
No laptop, no internet, no DVD player, no money, no anything. So rediculously bored.

Sunday 12th:
Started reading books.

Monday 13th:
We all had to go to a meeting at 10am in the student union bar to see if we were to be picked to then do our vivas again to the exterminal examiners. I did. Twice. One in the morning about the studio work, one in the afternoon for a dissertation discussion. I was taking advantage of the internet and while browsing on facebook saw something quite fustrating and may have lashed out without just cause. Fool.

Tuesday 14th:
Thought the day might go alright. At 2pm i got a phone call from my course leader.. I haven't passed the course. I have not recieved a degree. I got 37 for my studio practice, and therefore failed that modual, and failed the course. I think it was the first time i had cried since April. He informed me that i was able to resubmit work by the 1st august. I will be doing uni work for another month, but at home.

Wednesday 15th:
Recieved several emails, not nessessarily unwanted, but unexpected and upsetting. In retrospect i'm glad that i got them.

Thursday 16th:
There wasn't the suitcase that i wanted in the charity shop.

Friday 17th:
Today the Falmouth docks exploded. I'm hoping my bad luck has now rubbed off on someone else, but not too badly. The private view is later, my parents are driving in the rain to come and see me, and i'm a tad anxious.

Overall, it's been a pretty shit and fustrating week. I am currently on a compter in Uni. An ugly, bulky black Dell. I would do alot to just have my Mac back now.
I am going back home tomorrow. Back to familiarity. Back to working, instead of back to living. I am so dissapointed in myself, and i have noone to blame but me. 1st of August and i will be free. Hopefully.

Where the internet is plenty.

Number 20. Supplier of coffee, alcohol, and free internet since 2008. It's where we spend our time now.

New Children.

New children. I am quite sure that the Olympus Trip 35 is broken. It is my favourite of the new arrivals. All of these were £30 in total on ebay, including postage. Really lovely.

Yellow.

Orange juice and cheesy crisps in Number 20. Taking advantage of the free internet. Blogging away.

• Stunnin'
• Spongebob
• Almund
• Tragic
• Junior Spesh
• I like shells

The best weekend.

Friday afternoon and I go to the station with Chloë to pick up my friends. Phil and Luna. 6 hours on a train just to come to Falmouth for a visit. My other friend Steve was meant to be coming down as well, but because of money, he couldn't make it. 'Let down Emery'.

Even though it was disappointing that he couldn't be with us, he was very much there in spirit. Spirit, in this case, meaning through Phil, Luna and myself all taking the piss out of his voice, his mannerisms and sayings. "Stunnin'" being the word of the weekend, along with many others.

Dinner on friday evening consisted of barbecued burgers. Man points where won and man points were lost. Falmouth town was lovely and relaxed, with pleasant drinks, running up Jacob's Ladder, and some dancing. We tried and failed to entice Steve down for Saturday with the promise of an orgy. The failure was indeed shocking. We thought that this suggestion would be one which he really could not turn down.

Saturday was the reason that the dream team came to stay. The Garden party started at 7pm, so naturally with a whole sunny day to waste we spent it on the beach. It was lovely. Sand, paddles, ice cream, watermelon, wet shorts.

The sun really did give us a glow in preparation for the evening. Our necks, knees and collars where looking slightly more red than what might be considered healthy.

We live by the sea. If you aren't having chips on a regular basis down here then you aren't doing it right.

The sun got shy after our chips, but we sat outside and drank anyway. We had music and warmth. It was a perfect pre-drink for a perfect garden party.

It rained. It rained the heaviest rain it could have. The smell was beautiful, and it really felt like summer. In a weird twisted logic, it made it even more summery. It was so nice to hide under the music marquee together. It was only raining for half an hour, so we weren't too wet.

There was a Carousel.

It was really fun. Steve should have been sitting in-between me and Luna, on the big cockerel, going up and down.

Once again, the fireworks were amazing. No pictures really do them justice. There is something about them, it just makes you feel a bit warm inside.

The Stannary was just the same as ever. Drinks, shots and sticky floors. The music was interesting and the dancing was dodgy, as always.

We stayed until the very end. We walked home and had some reminiscent conversation with some people who I no longer like to see.

The morning after the night before, (This morning). We had an amazing breakfast courtesy of Luna. Two full packets of bacon cooked to crunchy perfection and half a dozen eggs all together in the pan. It tasted as amazing as it looked, and it really hit the spot.

I was quite sad when I dropped Phil and Luna back at the station. I have had such an amazing weekend. I don't think I have had so much fun, or at least in a very long time. I love these guys. Again, it was a shame that Steve couldn't make it, but he tried i guess, and he is gutted that he didn't come down. These are only a few pictures, but the weekend was too good to capture on film or in pixels. I tried very hard though.

This weekend has been one of those rare occasions when you really know what fun should be. It's enjoying your company, laughing at stupid things and not having to force anything 'fun' to happen. I really cannot describe how these last couple of days have made me feel.

This weekend was well and truly stunnin'.

Red.

I am having a nice day, and now a lovely evening on my own. This top used to be Chloë's but i rescued it from her charity shop giveaway.

I like how it makes my hair look vibrant. I didn't think that I could wear red so well. As it turns out, I can in small doses.

I also painted my nails. I like the name of the nail polish; 'Thread-Bare'.
There is still evidence of the last few weeks of pain on my nails, adding texture to them. They'll be there for a while.

Brother Sparrow.

Voices in the street, footsteps on the concrete
Guess I hear just every sound on the ground
From my window view, I know a color blue
that can bite so very hard, the day apart
Picture fresh as water clear
days have passed without you here
Street lights dancing on the dark across the park
Waiting for a word from you, waiting for a sign or two
Footseps on the city ground, you know the sound
Brother Sparrow, come tomorrow to my window
Brother Sparrow, come tomorrow to my window